It could have been a romance
We could have started off as lovers
But we weren’t meant to play that game
There was something else for us
It could have been a slow dance
But we just danced around each other
We were bound by something we couldn’t name
Something we wouldn’t discuss.
We never really dated
It was conversation and flirtation
I couldn’t figure out if it was you I loved
Or just the place where you came from
What started seemed ill-fated
It was hesitation and separation
But more than you could’ve been thinking of
I knew there was more to come.
Passion, hunger, and agony
Aching, craving, and desire
Ravenous burning ardor
Fever, fervor, fire!
You fought what you knew you were feeling
You fought it tooth and nail
You thought whoever would love you had to be insane
And so you kept your heart at bay
I wasn’t scared of revealing
I wasn’t telling you tall tales
And when I said what I felt in terms so plain
You said there could be no way.
And so the cracked and pitted highway of fate
Took us separate directions
You went your way, I went mine
Each with our own set of worries and cares
You thought you could just slam the gate
And effect a disconnection
But I was always in back of your mind
That someone who loved you out there.
Passion, hunger, and agony ...
From one holy land across the ocean to another
In the depths of the capital marble tower we came together as lovers
Seven searing years through emotional desert hell
Slam to an abrupt dead end halt, drink deep of each other’s well
Crescendo building rumbling till the power chords burst through
Detached disbelief but this time we knew it was true
But it wasn’t enough to keep you there
Were you running blind or running scared
Was it withdrawal or flight, I don’t know what hit subsequently
But I cursed the romance that shrouded us
I cursed the love that devoured us
And I cursed you when you found someone better than me
Just laying here together
In the darkness of our space
We connect for endless hours
Warmth to warmth, skin to skin
Our alliance never severed
We fought to reach this place
To carve out a world that’s ours
Over the wreckage of what might have been.
Remember how we lit the way for each other
When our respective ships ran aground
When our “Right Things” went horribly wrong
We sheltered each other as friends
No matter what you said, we were perfect for each other
We just had to crumble all the walls down
In exile from each other for way too long
Well, this exile is reaching its end.
Passion, hunger, and agony ...
©2023 The Hesh Inc.
This song was intentionally left off Soul In Exile because its subject matter was way too intense and personal (even though, as always, any resemblance to persons living or dead is PURELY coincidental). Also, I never quite felt right about the chorus. My original idea was to write a story of a doomed romance similar to Bruce Springsteen's "Backstreets," and I think I had come a little too close for comfort. Musically, it is based on a riff in D minor that I always seem to bang out on the piano whenever I have some frustration to get out; I may yet repurpose the music for other lyrics in the future, but this lyric will remain an outtake and a blog entry.
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